Love Every Part Of Yourself is my top-of-the-line offering. It is for people who want to be happy, love themselves, and develop the internal peace to be patient with the people in their lives. Therefore, they won’t settle for just reading a book or even taking a coaching call twice a week.
Call it my BMW of programs, although it is not nearly as expensive as an actual car (BMW’s range from $35,000 to $50,000, lol).
Why do I say it’s top of the line?
Because it will not only bring you a clear awareness of who you are – with all the love that needs to go with that awareness – but the results will last; the changes will be strong and internal, kind of like once you’ve learned how to bike ride (or roller skate) you can’t unlearn it.
That’s because the changes are not dependent on thinking yourself out of bad places. The changes will be at a level that is governed unconsciously.
This is not at all as weird or woo woo as it sounds; it happens to all of us almost every day. For example, let’s say you liked a particular movie star a lot. Then you learned that they beat their child. To you, they weren’t this nice guy/gal that you thought they were. It would take no effort on your part to no longer feel the same positive feeling toward them. Your feelings simply changed. Automatically.
Similarly, if you were absolutely positive you hated a food and then, to be polite at your friend’s dinner party, you tasted it only to discover that it was delicious, well, then, your feelings changed, didn’t they? And it was without any thought or effort on your part.
So, too, when ways of being that you thought were “the real you” turn out to only be unpleasant coping skills that you had to adopt, and our time together reveals a much nicer “real you,” it would be natural for you to feel more comfortable being the real you than the coping methods that got you in trouble before.
Deep, automatic learning – as opposed to memorized learning – sticks.
Can you see that?
And here’s the beautiful part of it all: To make these deep, unconscious changes doesn’t require the therapist (me or my team) to “teach” you anything.
We believe that each person is a wonderful person underneath their coping skills. They know right from wrong. It’s not that they need to learn how to be something new. Instead, what they need is to learn how to not be afraid to shed their coping skills (which have been protecting them) and let their “real Self” shine.
But that is exactly what we do. We help people –
- First discovering who that “real Self” actually is & who it’s not
- Then learning to love that true Self simply because it is not those unwanted coping mechanisms
- Third discovering why the coping mechanisms had to come into their lives – and appreciating them for the protection they gave us.
- Finally, “taming” these coping reactions and allowing their true Self to handle things.
So what would that look like?
When each person immerses themself in the Immersion Experience – through watching the videos, recording in their journal, thinking, reflecting, attending the two coaching calls per week, and of course, their intensive individual therapy – they go through the process above . . .
. . . and are able to have Self-led conversations with everyone in their lives.
Let’s follow Jamesthrough Module I to get a taste of the experience. Module I opens up feelings. James, if asked how he feels about himself, might say, “I really don’t like myself.” He might add that on one level, he knows he’s a great guy. But although it adds up logically, he just doesn’t feel it.
It’s important for James to learn his sources of pain – and heal them. I give people an “Emotions Chart” to check in with through-out the day and identify what they’re feeling and what happened just prior to having the bad feeling so they can start to learn the causes of all their feelings.
James, with great surprise, discovers that he hates the feeling his wife is bossing him around. He didn’t even know that that is what bothered him when she would innocently remind him to take care of something he’d forgotten. Turns out that the reminder was a huge trigger for him.
Prior to our work, he didn’t even know that. Now, he’s discovered five or six more triggers and where they came from – just in the first week of immersion in the program.
Thoughtfully, James says, “I shut down my feelings a long time ago.”
“Why?” asks the therapist. And James explains how much easier it was back then not to feel pain by getting numb and tuning out. . .
“What do you want now?” the therapist asks softly.
“To be part of my family,” James admits. He can’t bring himself to say he wants to like and love himself – yet. That’s too big a step in his mind. But he will eventually.
It’s a beginning. With a goal of “getting” everyone he loves, he will have to start to re-connect to his own feelings and heal the pain that his “shut-down” was hiding.
That is the beginning of an intense journey for him.
That means by the end of the Immersion Experience –
- The person is open, honest, and vulnerable, not at all defensive anymore
- The person truly wants to hear and understand the other
- The person wants to share deeply who he or she is inside
What happens to past hurts?
It takes time to heal those, but when people understand deeply what happened to them they can reach the hurt child inside and change the emotions of the past. Facts cannot be changed, but emotions can.
Wow! Isn’t that a wonderful thing? What would that be like for you?
One more thing: If your spouse will get on board so as to understand themself, then please check out my Immersion Experience for couples at https://drdeb.com/love-yourself-love-your-marriage-immersion-experience.
What’s Next?
Watch carefully the videos in my YouTube channel, https://youtube.com/c/DrDebEmpowers
OR – if you hate watching videos and you’d rather read, then go through this part of my website, https://loveyourselfloveyourmarriage.drdeb.com
THEN EMAIL ME drdeb@drdeb.com so we can talk. I’d love to set up a zoom call with you.