Today I wanted you to understand what I stand for. It’s more than “saving a marriage.” I want you to be happy. I believe that everyone should be happy. Now, right away, you can jump on this and say, “Wait a minute, what about people in misery, in poverty, people who are disabled, etc?”
And my answer is that many people in the worst of circumstances find a way to be happy. Sometimes, their happiness is laced with tears as was the case of Maya Angelou, who was our Poet Laureate. But she prevailed over the obstacles – and they were big and powerful obstacles. To wrestle with power and win must be a source of great happiness.
I can’t take care of every sort of problem. I was put here on this Earth to help people whose marriage and family are distressing for them and they can’t cope. What you would find when you work with me is that I give far more than promised and expected because I want that badly for you to succeed and be happy.
But many of you feel very much alone and there is no marriage left, to speak of. I am here to help you, too. The start of the process always begins with you, yourself anyway, because you can’t be happy with someone else if you aren’t even happy with yourself. After all, how can the other person enjoy you if you don’t enjoy you?
And how do you have love and appreciation left over for them if you don’t have it for yourself?
So, paradoxically, in order to be a magnet for your spouse, you must be happy and content with who you are, deep down. Generally, people who are unhappy and frustrated with themselves take it out on others. They don’t mean to. They may even do it in the subtlest of ways, like having a grimace or just not smiling. That’s enough.
Imagine walking in the door and your spouse barely looks at you, barely speaks to you. Are you doing that? Have you ever done that? Do you have the idea that if you “show them how bad you feel” they will understand and be nicer?
That idea doesn’t work. It boomerangs. It chases away the person you’re trying to attract.
So what’s the solution if you’re not happy?
The very first step is to be sure you know what’s bothering you and fix that problem. This sounds simple and it is simple but not at all easy. It takes work to investigate every stray corner of your heart and soul. Pinning down the real problem is often difficult and it really takes courage to face yourself.
I have said in these posts before that the people I work with roll up their sleeves to do that work. They are willing to face themselves. Are you?
If you are and you want happiness, book a call: https://drdeb.com/book.