by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Nov 24, 2006 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
We were making progress, this new couple and I. Eli was getting it. He realized that his sarcastic remarks, his put-downs, his glares, and his barely-controlled anger all constitute verbal abuse. He was starting to work effectively with his tools, too. He had...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Nov 7, 2006 | Marriage and Relationships
We all know what positive reinforcement is: Something you give to someone to increase behavior you want. You give it following the behavior and, if done with skill and intelligence, it will lead to more of the same. For example, you tell the woman you’re out with,...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Aug 18, 2006 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
REPRINTED WITH PERMISSION from the Florida Jewish Journal, p. 14 “It’s your fault!” Robbie screamed. “Do you understand what you did? Do you understand what a terrible loss this means?” His screams filled the air with a sick heaviness, a light and bright afternoon...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Dec 15, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
REPRINTED BY PERMISSION from The Annals of The American Psychotherapy Association, 2001, vol. 4, No. 5, pp.15-17. Do not be fooled into thinking the percent of battering victims (about 16%) in this country is small. Stripped of the obfuscation of statistics, that...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Dec 9, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
Consider these important elements in working out your relationship problems: 1. Every abuser has been a victim Research proves again and again that people who were victimized as children are likely to grow up to be either abusers or drawn towards abusive relationships...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Dec 4, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
1. Accept The Fact That Everything You Did Made Sense I was once speaking to a brilliant and accomplished woman who had recovered from alcohol abuse. She had been severely emotionally and verbally abused most of her life. Abuse hurts. Sometimes there is only one way...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Dec 4, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
Perpetrators don’t always want to be. I cannot begin to tell you how many parents, for example, say, “I would never want to hurt my child.” Then they do it anyway. It takes FOUR steps to recover from being a perpetrator: Part I: Admitting you have...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 8, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
Scene: A woman walks into a hospital emergency room, bloody and bruised. Her husband, teeth clenched, assists her. X-rays reveal several broken bones as well. As the staff tries to determine what happened, the husband bursts into tears, admitting he beat up his wife....
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Aug 16, 2003 | Verbal and Emotional Abuse
Nothing drills down another person’s happiness like constant blame. “The sun rose so it’s your fault. There was an earthquake on the other side of the world, so, again, it’s your fault. Everything is your fault. In fact, I don’t know why...
