My “Love Yourself Love Your Marriage Individual Learning + Group Coaching” offer is for couples who want to stay married but who have been struggling with communication breakdowns, disconnect, or discord. They have tried weekend programs and/or marriage counseling and it has not helped.
Although discouraged, they still would like to make the marriage work either because they believe in family or because they still love each other. (And If they have not suffered through unhelpful programs yet, then this one will be a breath of fresh air.)
Furthermore, the stress of the marriage may have negatively impacted their business life and possibly even their business relationships which gives added motivation to fix the problem once and for all.
My introductory “Love Yourself Love Your Marriage” offer for new clients is a 4-month Group Coaching + Indivdual Learning program, Level 1.
Many of the tools in my program are proprietary that I created over the 30 years of being a Marriage & Family Therapist. Here are the things that we cover:
1) Taming Your Triggers
This is the biggest thing I’ve found that will significantly decrease the stess of communicating with your spouse because less reactivity leads to more fruitful conversations.
I have a process for taming triggers that is both drawn from cutting-edge research in the field of trauma-informed marital counseling and from my 30+ years as a therapist (20+ at the doctoral level), and we can use it to help you get clear on things like the origins of the triggers in your life, techniques for de-energizing your body’s reactions to triggers, and – most powerfully – how to eliminate the trigger reaction entirely (see #2, below).
2) Healing Old Wounds
There is a way of changing the effect that the past has on people. People can re-visit past situations in their imagination, and when they use this powerful gift correctly, their brains can literally “re-wire” so that although the memory stays intact, the emotional devastation is gone.
They then can combine this tool with what they’ve learned about what triggers them to heal the very causes of their being triggered. My approach is based on the work of Dr. Richard C. Schwartz primarily, but also other trauma therapy models.
3) Heart-Led Communication
Without trigger reactions hijacking their thinking, people have the clarity and calm to fully express themselves. Furthermore, as their partner is going through the same process, they’re now able to fully listen to each other. In addition, because they now feel heard rather than attacked, each person is able to be more and more open and vulnerable in their communications.
The goal here is to help clients practice communicating in a healthy way
so that they’re empowered to go forward on their own and don’t need me to be a referee forever for their conversations.
How It Works
In the ”Love Yourself Love Your Marriage” Coaching program you get Group Zoom calls with the chance to ask questions, written assignments and frameworks, and unlimited, lifetime access to the Educational videos. People tell me that every time they watch the videos, the get another precious nugget out of them.
The Coaching calls are small or medium size group format which fosters the ability to ask all the questions you may have as well as the feeling of group support from people who are experiencing similar things to you.
To gain the max, people who are the best fit for this program need the time and headspace to do the thinking and inner reflection that is part of the course. They need to want to make the marriage a good one rather than just “get along” which means using the tools given in the Educational videos – even if it’s difficult.
The investment for this program is $4,800 per couple – quite small compared to the amount of brainpower that I put into creating the course, the number of years I’ve spent sharpening my ear to know how to answer any question you may have at lightning speed, and the results that kind of precision can get.
There is a handy payout plan available, too, of $600/person/month for the 4 months.
I also understand that people who have had more trauma or less support through their childhood may want to work with me beyond the initial 4-month introductory Level 1 period so I have set up the option to add extra months as you wish when the Level 1 program is over. That is Level 2.
The next step if you’re interested in the Coaching Program (or have questions about it) is to DM me on Facebook or email me at drdeb@drdeb.com. We’ll have a chat over Messenger to see if it’s a good fit.
(I also encourage you to DM or email me if you’re not sure that this particular program is a good fit for you, but you would still like my help in some way. We’ll discuss whether there is another offer I can create for you. For example, let me know if you want a more intense, personalized therapy program.)
When you send your DM or email, it would help if you’d include the following information:
–A very brief description of your current situation (e.g., “Whenever we talk, it turns into a fight”; or, “We have nothing to say to each other”; or, “We get along but there’s no spark”; etc.)
–What you have tried so far (a Church weekend, Gottman, individual therapy, marriage counseling, etc.)
–What you did gain/learn from the above
–Why what you learned isn’t working
The Results You Can Expect When You Complete Level 1 or 2:
NOTE: For some people this will happen at the end of Level 1; for others, Level 2. The amount of time required is personal and depends on the severity of the childhood trauma, or its intensity, or its duration, or the level of emotional support and validation you as a child received, or the helpfulness of previous therapy.
*You will know and love who you are.
*You will no longer be burdened with negative self-thoughts.
*You will accept your less strong points with inner peace.
*You will accentuate your strong points and use them with compassion for those around you.
*You will feel connected to yourself and to the others in your life that are important to you – and they will feel it.
*You will be a wiser person, able to protect yourself appropriately.
*You will embrace life with joy, compassion, connection, creativity, intuition, and perspective.
• Together, you wil laugh, share, enjoy, and get over the speedbumps gracefully.
• Together, you will talk about the deep stuff from the heart.
• Together, you will love each other and put each other first.
Reach out by DM or email to drdeb@drdeb.com
