by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 22, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
Isn’t it nice to go to someone who really listens? I mean after trying and trying to get through to your spouse – for years – to finally have the therapist sit there calmly and patiently listening, isn’t that wonderful? And then they get it....
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 18, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
How long is this going to go on? This is ridiculous! I’ve told him not once but a thousand times. I won’t take it any-more! It’s got to stop. It doesn’t matter “what” has got to stop. It could be fighting, blaming, cheating,...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 15, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
I absolutely hate being negative because I believe in people – even therapists. But I keep hearing how people argue in the therapy room and go out no better than they came in. Why doesn’t it work? Well, if you’ve been in therapy, check and see if...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 11, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
Not always, but mostly, the burden of change in the marriage falls on the man. Why is that? Statistically, 70% of divorces are initiated by women. That’s a phenomenal number. Why is that? It seems that the old saying is true, “happy wife, happy...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 8, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
Eva walks in the door and Tom, her husband, barely looks at her, barely speaks to her. Tom is stealing Eva’s happiness. Why? Why would he do that? He’ll tell you that he’s not happy. He’ll tell you that Eva is the problem, the reason....
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 4, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
The answer is zero. Why do I say that? Because the unwritten rule in therapy is that you don’t have to accomplish anything. There is no guarantee that you’ll get “there.” In fact, neither one of you knows where “there” is. I know. I...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Sep 1, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
You know the story of the guy who was abusive, had a temper, was controlling and demanding, got divorced because of all that and managed to keep it together long enough for a new girl to fall in love with him; and of course she never saw a hint of all the rotten...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Aug 28, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
When you look at yourself and your own behavior, you just can’t understand how you got here. You’re a good person. You have a good heart. You wouldn’t want to hurt anybody. Yet…. You’ve found yourself stooping way lower than you could have...
by DrDeb Hirschhorn | Aug 25, 2019 | Marriage and Relationships
I was on the phone with a woman who was desperate to fix her marriage and my heart broke for her. But I knew I would not be helping her. She started off telling me the names her husband called her and then I was thinking, “I work with verbal abusers; no...
