There are two kinds of people in this world. We can call one kind pessimists. They also can be called depressed. Because the definition of depression is loss of hope, lose of belief, loss of a dream. Well, that's also pessimism. Maybe the slight difference between...

There's lots of reasons why a couple could be unhappy. Do you notice that the same stuff repeats itself over and over? There's a reason for that. It's not because people are "insane" - meaning they keep doing the same thing expecting a different result. Not at all....

You know the story of the guy who was abusive, had a temper, was controlling and demanding, got divorced because of all that and managed to keep it together long enough for a new girl to fall in love with him; and of course she never saw a hint of all the rotten...

When people are miserable and they want out of the marriage, I do get their feelings. Right now they are sick and tired of something that you're doing or have done. Maybe they're sick of the same annoying irritating tone of voice that you give every time you bring up...

Today I wanted you to understand what I stand for. It's more than "saving a marriage." I want you to be happy. I believe that everyone should be happy. Now, right away, you can jump on this and say, "Wait a minute, what about people in misery, in poverty, people who...

The answer is zero. Why do I say that? Because the unwritten rule in therapy is that you don't have to accomplish anything. There is no guarantee that you'll get "there." In fact, neither one of you knows where "there" is. I know. I did that for years. True...

OKAY, DRDEB, PEOPLE DO CHANGE, BUT NOT THE PERSON I'M MARRIED TO Why would someone say that? Why would they be so dead set against seeing that the person they were married to could change? Here's my theory: Research says that we make decisions and THEN we come up with...

Not always, but mostly, the burden of change in the marriage falls on the man. Why is that? Statistically, 70% of divorces are initiated by women. That's a phenomenal number. Why is that? It seems that the old saying is true, "happy wife, happy life." Do men have...

I was on the phone with a woman who was desperate to fix her marriage and my heart broke for her. But I knew I would not be helping her. She started off telling me the names her husband called her and then I was thinking, "I work with verbal abusers; no problem." She...

I'm a therapist. I believe in therapy. But.... My heart is broken from the number of people who have spent months and years in therapy and …. not changed their lives one iota. I understand that "therapy" means healing and sometimes the only thing we need to feel...