I look abusers in the eye I tell them what's what. With love. Because they're not inherently evil.  We're going to take a peek into little Randy's house. Randy is four years old. His three-year-old sister just got a gift from a doting aunt. It was a sweet-faced doll....

Suppose a client walks into a therapist's office every week for a month and each time, he has a spot on his shirt. He is down and out, looking for a job and can't get one. Should the therapist: tell him flat out that he has spots on his clothes? ignore the spots as if...

Coaching isn't about feelings, right? That's what I used to think. That is, until I put together my own coaching program. Which clearly focuses on feelings. How could it not? Feelings run the world! Politics is all about feelings. Love and marriage - of course - is...

I was never a therapist who was content to listen and say, "Awww" to complaints and problems. Mind you, I am compassionate. I'm not as hard-nosed as it might sound here. But I also am a roll-up-your-sleeves type of person. Whether that’s preparing a meal for 16 or...

My dissertation took forever. Being slightly -- only slightly, mind you -- OCD, I had to do the most thorough job of research ever. It actually was about 8 years. Well, I had little kids; sue me. Anyway, when I was all done, I had this stack of transcripts in my hand...

I myself used to subscribe to the myth that it requires two people to make a marriage work. After all, I was a marriage counselor. How do you do marriage counseling with only one person?? That was until, we'll call him Joey, came to see me, insisting that his wife...

There was this guy who would not look at me. He sat in our session with his arms crossed, looking elsewhere. He admitted he was "irritated." His wife was sitting there in tears, and through her tears, she said, "This is what it's like for me! Now you know!" And the...

Did you know that right now, it’s possible for you to fall in love -- with each other -- again? I’ll explain how in just a second. But first, let’s talk about why so many people think this is impossible. The truth is that you’ve been LET DOWN. Let down by so many...

The prevailing wisdom is that if someone is a narcissist, they cannot change so you have to leave them.  And you have total proof because your narcissist did not change. You ranted. You raved. You ignored. You threatened. You're sorry to say you even had an affair....

I've heard the story too many times of people who go to therapy to fix a problem and they walk out with a bigger one.  The therapist wants to hear what's going on so the couple obliges by starting a fight! Right there in front of the therapist. The therapist feels...