You know that old saying that you can't change someone; they have to want to change? I disagree with it. Why?  Because experience does change us. And we can create experiences that are effective in making changes. Here's an example from my own store of...

 "Yes, DrDeb, you're very nice. I believe that you're sincere when you say that you believe your program works. And works for everybody. But I don't think, frankly, it will work for ME." --Well, I get that.  It's normal to thing your situation is worse than everyone...

"DrDeb," Kenny was complaining, "it's only my wife that triggers me! I have lots of relationships - from work to my religious community to my kids' schools where I'm very active - and I get along well with everyone else…. ….so it must be that I married the wrong...

Of course it can work. Marriage counseling is a dismal failure. But not if it's done right. Learn the one problem that causes people to stop before they got half way through the race. Learn the one antidote to it. Find out the exact steps to get the marriage to be the...

Whether it's the man or the woman, at one point, one person will shut down. And there is nothing the other person can do about it. They can beg or cry or yell, nothing works. They're stuck. Out in the cold. Find out the 7 reasons why and why all their tactics don't...

I feel really bad about last Thursday's live. I said it was going to be a hands-on workshop and somehow or the other, it didn't turn out to be. So I'm making it up to you this week. Big time. One thing you will get to know about me in this group is that I keep my...

 Why should you care about what Self energy is? That's like saying, why should you care if someone is about to come after you with a baseball bat. Let me explain.  Think a moment to your most important relationship and how it feels right now. Think about the "yuck"...

 Why is it that some people go to therapy for many months with zero improvement? Why is it that even in a great couples program like mine, some people need more time?  Why is it that in order to heal and make a great marriage, some couples need to be separated?  Why...

 Researchers have learned that being romantically in love goes way beyond passion. You know those SSRI's that depressed people take? What's in them? Well, they stand for "selective serotonin re-uptake inhibitors." The idea is to inhibit - stop - the re-absorption back...

 Sometimes I get the image of a rodeo, or a roundup thing. You know, the guys with the rope trying to get the steer down. Branding?  What do I know? I'm a New Yorker. But the image is so strong with me -  It's the women (mostly) tugging and pulling at their ropes. At...