You know that feeling: You try really, I mean you try really hard to be aware, sensitive, kind, thoughtful, hold your tongue - - and by golly, somehow or other you screwed up again.  Will there never be an end to it? I mean, no one is perfect; how can I get past...

 Let's start with some definitions: Compassion, empathy, and sympathy.  Empathy  Maybe you've heard the word "empath." An empath is someone who cries with you because they literally feel your pain. Sometimes this is a very good thing. At a funeral, for example, the...

 "I am so sad." "I feel like I've lost years of my life through the mistakes I've made." "I keep messing up; I don't like myself because of it."  "The only person in the world who ever loved me was Him (or Her) and they've left." "I need a drink." (Substitute any...

Part 5: Trigger Tracking  This is the last in our series. When you go over all the posts from the first 4 parts and you add in the Juxtaposition which I did September 1, 2022, plus this one, you've got the essence of the most important tools that we use to help you...

Part 4: Distress Tolerance  You will find Parts 1, 2, and 3 fascinating, so I suggest you go back and check those out. Meanwhile, let's plunge into what Distress Tolerance is and how it is a great transition to Internal Family Systems (IFS) work.  Distress Tolerance...

Part 3: Positive Thinking  We're on a roll here. You're starting to get all the tools of my course for free! Yikes! Why would I do that? Because if I've helped you, great. And if you need more help, then you will know exactly what it is we do and how we do it. And you...

A Five-Part Series. Part 2: Breathing  If you're new to this group, maybe you haven't noticed how often I share the wonders of Internal Family Systems (IFS), the brilliant methodology for healing wounds - and most importantly, discovering and loving who you are. So a...

A Five-Part Series. Part 1: Affirmations  Or another way of putting this is, "Hey, DrDeb. You keep talking up Internal Family Systems and how great it is; why do you also teach other tools?" All the tools fit into each other like a neat crossword puzzle.  But let me...

 Sledgehammers and chainsaws are great tools. They pound what's needed and they cut down trees. But don't use them to kill ants, please. We humans come fully equipped with powerful parts that basically run a tight ship for us.  There is a part that gets me up in the...

 Here's my answer: There's no reason to actually try to change someone who is already good, kind, generous, wise, and connected. That doesn't sound like anybody you know, right? But it is.  See, here is what I believe - and my team believes - and some very specific...