3 Things People Can Do To Help Spouses Overcome Insecurity

Elizabeth stood back and looked at the job she had just completed. She had created a display for her work team and it was clear and well organized. But Elizabeth walked off in disgust, thinking it was awful. And no one could convince her otherwise. She came home depressed. Childhood Origin of Insecurity Elizabeth’s insecurity is clear from her childhood. She grew up in a home where no matter what she did or how she did it, it was never good enough. Her parents would say that since they knew she was smart, they were sure she could “do better.” This is not a formula to bring out the best in a child. Instead, it’s a formula for insecurity. Being married to Sam didn’t help. It seemed she could not meet his expectations. However she did things, Sam found a reason that they could have or should have been done differently. In other words, Elizabeth married her parents. Sam deserved a big bright award called the “Aiding and Abetting Insecurity” award. For some peculiar reason, he thought that if he told Elizabeth how to do things “better,” then she would mind-read what Sam thought was better in the future. That’s a good trick: Get annoyed at your spouse for doing something you didn’t agree with so that miraculously she (or he) will (a) know next time what you wanted and (b) actually agree with you that it is the better way. So here’s the question: If we could wave a magic wand over Sam to be a nicer, kinder, gentler, more supportive husband, would that take away the insecurity...
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