6 Tips To Handle Difficult People

Let me tell you about Penny and Kenny. Living with Kenny would test anybody’s patience. How can Penny handle it? Kenny thinks he can voice his opinion in the strongest possible terms, even to the degree that he insults others. He also doesn’t think he has to apologize because he should voice those very opinions; they need to be said. His wife, Penny, has tried to get him to understand the damage he does that way, but he was stubbornly clinging to his position when we peeked in on their lives. Penny has some very specific expectations of her husband. There are all the “shoulds”: He should be more sensitive to others; he should not argue; he should see other people’s positions; and so forth. Unfortunately, that is not the husband she got. And, what’s more, if she were only to let go of these expectations, she actually has a chance to help her husband to become the person she wants him to become. You see, people stiffen their positions when they feel backed up against a wall. They leave no room for compromise when others convey their expectations – and they don’t meet them. On the other hand, when Penny told her husband, “I know in my heart that you are a good person,” she conveyed helpful expectations. If he is already a good person, then acting good should not be too hard for him. Statements like this soften others’ positions. However, when she said, “I get that you think my brother’s feelings shouldn’t be hurt since you didn’t mean to call him a murderer in your stupid...
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